To have success in life is a huge goal, right? At least for many people, it is. It may be that the pursuit for success is a central issue in your life, or at least peripheral. Somehow, I imagine that you, like myself, spend a good amount of time, energy and dedication looking for your personal and professional success.
The question I ask you, however, is this: what is success for you? The reason for my questioning is simple. If having a successful life is important to you, the definition of what you mean by success will function as a compass, similar to a life purpose compass, and will influence your day to day life, your decisions, your choices.
So, it is very important that you have clarity and awareness to where the “North” of this compass is pointing to. After all, that’s where you want to go, right?
Whether you search in the dictionary, ask people, or just use your common sense, you will find two dimensions to the classic and socially accepted definition of success:
When we think of successful people, that’s what they’ve achieved, isn´t it? Money, fame, power, everything that´s juicy. Does it make your mouth water too? Are you envious of them, in a good way, of course? If you achieve this success, wouldn’t all your problems be solved? Well, at least that’s what you might expect.
Porsche Carrera (Photo: contrastaddict / iStock)
One problem with this classic definition, however, is that it assumes that money will bring happiness and this isn´t necessarily true. If it were, all successful and wealthy people would be happy, and we know that this isn´t the case. Money is important because, if used correctly, it can make life much easier for you and those who love you. However, to put all the definition of success there is very limiting.
Why? Because life has much more to offer if you look at it more broadly. By ignoring other factors, such as pursuit of meaning and purpose in life, personal growth and happiness, for example, you may be giving up living a fuller, more complete, balanced and fulfilled life.
The second problem is that this is not necessarily your definition of success. To let go of defining and becoming aware of what success means to you is a serious mistake. Many good people who love you may have a definition of success for you. They may think that being a CEO of a multinational, having a happy marriage, being a doctor or lawyer, having children, for example, means success in your life. But, my question to you is: is this what you want for your life?
If it isn´t, and you are pursuing success defined by someone else, my question to you is: why do you do it? Where do you want to get to? Is living a life like this bringing you happiness? Do you feel fulfilled?
What really matters is what the word success means to you. It must be personal, based on your own values. It has to make sense and be aligned with your life purpose. Only then will the search for success help you live a full life, with more quality, more joy and more happiness.
My proposal is that you create your own definition of success, broader and more personal than the classic or the one that was fabricated for you by your social environment. Depending on what it is, it may even be that you completely ignore these presets and create something entirely new. It doesn´t matter! The important thing is that it makes sense to you.
To help you with this process, I put together some ideas for thinking and reflecting. Maybe they can help you expand your understanding of success and create new possibilities for your life. But see them only as a starting point. Many others might exist!
A while ago, I wrote about the importance of being aware of your purpose in life and how to use it in your daily life to be happier. Well, a measure of success can be how much you can actually do that and let yourself be guided by your purpose. The more you do, the more successful you´ll be!
Know that thing that you love to do? Your true passion? Well! Getting it done day in and day out and finding a profession or career path where you can exercise it to earn the money you need to support yourself is what will make the difference to be successful.
I have a friend who, from an early age, loved music and playing the guitar. Coming from a traditional family, this was spurred on as a good hobby, but never as a professional path. He tried many other professions, such as communication and publicity, but he only became happy and felt that he´d achieved success when he started earning a living and supporting himself with his music. Before that, his life fell short of what he himself wanted. That’s what I’m talking about.
Happy woman (Photo: pixelfit / iStock)
What makes you feel happy? Having time for you, your family, being with friends? To do what you like? Help others? Try to find out and try to incorporate it into your definition of personal success. At the end of each day, look at what you have done and ask if you have done your best to be happy. You may or may not have succeeded. However, whenever you realize that you have done your best to be happy, I am sure you will feel closer to success.
This is another good dimension to your personal success, especially if you´re like my mother. She can´t live without being surrounded by people and interacting with them constructively and in harmony. Yeah! Part of her definition of personal success is being actively engaged with many people in a positive way. When, for some reason, this doesn´t happen in her daily life, she feels very unsuccessful…
For many people, doing good is essential to feeling happy. I know a lot of people who, if they are not involved in activities that help others, they can´t feel successful – even if they have achieved success in other areas. If you are one of them, doing good has to be central in your day-to-day life, which includes working routines. So, remember to enter this point into your own definition of success, okay?
Having a happy and harmonious family is the purpose of many people’s lives. For them, the meaning of success is to achieve this through life. My grandmother was like this and I think I learned from her… As for other people, this is not the purpose, but one of the goals of life and that, consequently, affects and directs other decisions. In both cases, having a family in harmony gives you a sense of success.
Climbing a barrier (Photo: AlexBrylov / iStock)
The ability to persevere, fall and rise, move on and overcome problems can be critical to your success. Maybe you’re one of those people who wasn´t born with a golden spoon in your mouth and have to overcome many barriers in order to get somewhere. Well! If this is your case, the ability to overcome issues frequently will be a large portion of the reason of your success.
Create something of your own that you have idealized and built. For many people, success only exists when they can build something by themselves. If you are part of this group, following the path traveled by your parents, grandparents or mentors, even if efficiently, won´t grant you with satisfaction. A true feeling of success will only come if it´s according to your rules.
For many, feeling that they have done their best in all situations throughout the day is very important. On the other hand, when this doesn´t happen, there is a huge feeling of personal failure. If this is true for you, at the end of the day, always ask yourself: have I given my best today in everything that I have done
Having the ability to create something that generates value for the world or for someone else can be very challenging and stimulating. The goal here is not necessarily to generate wealth. The goal is simply to feel the satisfaction of creating something that creates value for the other. You are the father of a child and you can say with great pride: look what I have created. Without my contribution this wouldn´t exist!
Letting life go by and thinking about what you´ll do when something happens in the future, blurring the present, can be very bad. Being connected with what happens today and enjoying every phase of your life can be very fulfilling and your own definition for success. Live consciously today, enjoy the little things and be happy with them. Sounds like a successful life, doesn´t it?
Preparing a cake (Photo: evgenyatamanenko / iStock)
These ideas are just a starting point! If you´ve read until here, you have already understood what I mean. In that case, the recipe for your success would look more or less like this:
Your definition of success has to make sense to you. The broader it is, greater are the chances of having a richer, fuller, happier and more prosperous life.
Finally, remember to stick to the right direction. In order to do this, I suggest a very simple exercise. At the end of each day, read the definition you have created and ask yourself, “Have I done my best today to achieve my success?” Grade this from 0 to 10 for your effort and think about what you can do differently the next day to improve your own grade. Over time, and with the grades converging on 10 frequently, I guarantee that you´ll be feeling very successful.
Good luck!
Cover photo credit – Successfull family (Photo: nd3000 / iStock)
